The Moon looks good from up here!

Dear Reader(s),

When I started this blog approximately a year ago, I decided to make it an insanely funny one. I tried for some time, relentlessly searching for that elusive funny bone hiding somewhere in my body. And considering I started writing because a friend of mine (who incidentally never read anything I ever wrote in my life) convinced me that I could write well, didn't really help. Ya ya. I'm THAT gullible. But I guess everyone came unto this Earth with the belief that they are meant for greater things. And I thought writing was my true calling. I remember after publishing my first post, I could somewhere in the future, see my name being called on stage for the Pulitzer or the Man Booker. I'm still confused why its called 'Man' Booker. Are they only awarded to Men? Or is 'Man' supposed to be a prefix symbolizing some kind of inexplicable greatness? Either way I thought I  totally deserved it and I was this close to being written about in the Guardian ( If you're dreaming, why bother about the Dainik Jagran. Make it big I say! ) and having tea with the Queen in Buckingham Palace, yada yada. All I had to do was to send out a couple of emails and facebook messages to friends/cousins in the name of publicity and then sit back, relax and watch my fame take over the world. What happened in reality was slightly different from how I had pictured it to be. I apologize for my unfounded megalomaniac fantasies. Really sorry.

I have approximately two readers ( that was a rather hard number to count! ) one of who, was the friend who convinced me that I could write ( But now I think maybe that's not a widely accepted opinion. ) and the other needs constant reminders and more than subtle hints to visit my blog ( is it that painful?! *shedding a tear* ). I tried making them leave comments, to the effect that the blog-surfing world thinks its a life-changing blog worth spending some time and a few words of appreciation over. In the process, I discovered that one of them was severely techno-capped ( technologically handicapped I mean! I'm awesome at word play right?! *nudge* ) and the other just stopped commenting for some reason ( I'm this close to falling to my knees and begging for a comment. But I would like to believe that I'm a self-respecting individual. Well almost. ) I tried blaming the world, for being filled with people who are shallow and my 'deep, insightful' reflections deserve a 'niche' audience. But it ended up being more niche than I would have been proud of. I thought of advertising my blog posts on facebook, but then held myself back with the fear of coming across as needy (ya ya. I think too much. *sigh*) After endless efforts at subtly hinting through Blackberry status messages/facebook/artfully disguised lines in disjointed emails, I thought of reading it myself from the unbiased point of view of an average reader ( a voice within constantly screaming out how awesome I was often proved to be an insurmountable distraction I must say! ). What I read was quite shocking. What happened to my funny bone? I sounded like a depressed hormonal pregnant woman who hates her husband, resents her unborn child and constantly stares at the ceiling fan wondering whether it'll hold her weight. One tight slap. Well I guess I had it coming.

So without much ado I'm setting out in the search of that darned bone that's supposed to tickle you. And unless I lose a leg or something, I promise to be funny and not in a rambling painful alcoholic sort of way.

I love you dear readers. Sincerely hoping you exist.

Overtly apologetic - bordering on desperate - blogger.

P.S. The post should have been ideally titled Rude Awakening or Open letter to the Elusive Reader or something. But I decided to go with the Moon in order to accost the unsuspecting blog skimmer. Sue me.